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CALL OF THE DAY: breakfast with Bilingual Papi

lots o' honey and a nice flared base...

lots o' honey and a nice flared base...

Oh, Bilingual Papi and his themed calls.

Our 10-minute session a few days ago would be considered "general interest" or "uncategorized"; everything fell on his standard ass-eating to ass-pounding spectrum, with the obligatory Spanish sexual slang thrown in. My repertory is slow to develop, because I don't talk with him all THAT often and we can't take time to drill the vocabulary, if you know what I mean.

Wait, I mean really learning the pronunciation and making sure that my pronunciation is correct. What did you think I meant?

This morning, Bilingual Papi wanted breakfast. He wanted to eat me up, and he wanted me to beg for it; the new vocabulary words for the day are "comerme" (eat me) and "devorarme" (devour me). He wanted to break me open and get some cream. He wanted to spread marmalade on my ass cheeks and drizzle honey down my crack. He wanted me to come on his face, and glaze him like a doughnut. Towards the end he told me to ask for his beef injection; I did, but only because he had responded well when I spontaneously asked for his spicy chorizo.

My billet host, he's a chef, he was in the next room during this, and I could hear him nearly busting a gut trying to keep from laughing. Hell, the truth is, I was trying to keep from laughing, and not really succeeding. With Bilingual Papi, I do tend to giggle a lot, not at him, never at him, as wild as he can get sometimes. Just with him, I just have to giggle with joy sometimes at this energy that he brings to it, and his imagination. His play-by-play outlines are usually over the top, but he is not being ironic. He doesn't object to my laughing or occasionally teasing, but during the scenes we enact, he is not joking around. He really does want to hear me ask for a hot beef injection, and tells me to say it.

Here's the thing: Bilingual Papi's fantasies are simple, but for the 10 or 15 minutes that we play together, he enters into them entirely. So many people want to learn how to talk dirty, they ask me for hints and suggestions, and I have to tell them no, just getting a list of phrases and words is not the right way to start. They're holding themselves back; they're holding themselves up. You have to be ready to drop everything, to forget feeling like a fool, to forget that "hot beef injection" is one of the weakest phrases ever for talking about your dick. You have to forget what you know, every time, because what you actually need to know, for this time, the other person is going to give you in just a moment, and you have to be ready.

When I hang up the phone, my host and I both start laughing. "He seems really nice," says my host. "He seems like a lot of fun."

Yes, I think, he is. And his appetites are amazing.

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