I’ve got the ongoing and slowly growing list of pet peeves. But I also want to hit the flip side, with …
Things I didn’t think I’d like about doing phone sex
- post-coital laughing. On the good calls, after I hear them finish and they’re winding down, I always feel like laughing. It’s something like joy that I can’t hold in. I make some crack about doing a Jackson Pollock number on the wall (if they’re that educated), or about both of us having to sleep in the wet spot. But that’s just a cover for the fact that I want to giggle at how much fun it’s possible to have doing this.
The corollary is…
- making callers laugh. When I started, I was warned that I shouldn’t crack jokes. Unless it’s a Tiny Penis/Humiliation call, in which case the more and nastier jokes I make the better. But by nature I am a jokester, a performer: I crave response. So I poke and tease and make smart-ass remarks. Making them laugh out loud is almost as good as hearing them shout themselves hoarse when they come.
- not having to dress up to go to work. To any phone-sex johns who may have stumbled across this blog, please accept my apologies for bursting your bubble, but seriously, pajama city.
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