Archive for Uncategorized

Cameryn feels right at home at Bent Wit: Fantasy!

Title: Cameryn feels right at home at Bent Wit: Fantasy!
Location: Club Oberon, Zero Arrow Street (at Mass. Ave), Cambridge
Link out: Click here
Description: Yes, there will be mermaids. And French Horns. And, of course, Mariah Carey covers- are you really surprised?

Get your tickets early \'cause you don\'t want to miss this month\'s installation of Bent Wit Cabaret themed: Fantasy! This line-up is too juicy to ignore, so think happy thoughts, get dressed to the nines, and settle in to enjoy the radical explosion of our brains for your pleasure...

Hosted by: Mary Dolan and UnAmerika\'s Sweetheart Karin Webb
House Band: Elephant Tango Ensemble (including members of Goli and Humanwine)
Featuring the Genius of: Cameryn Moore the Phone Whore, Second Lines Social Aid and Pleasure Society Brass Band, Babes in Boinkland, Evan O\'Television, Sugar Dish, Femme Brulée, Lainey Schooltree, Ginger Rita, Rhino Preserves (a collaboration by french horn player Anne Howarth and Monkey House Dance\'s Karen Krolak), Puppets, and so much more...
Featured Drink: Smoke and Mirrors
Start Time: 20:00
Date: 2010-04-11

taking it to the next level

I read somewhere that you should never apologize on your blog for long gaps between postings. So, hey everyone! You all can suck my big pink overbooked dick! Woo-hoo!

The good news is, I am fully back in the swing of things. I was worried about re-entry after a month away, but everything was fine. Funnily enough, the first call on my first shift back was my extreme top. When the dispatcher told me it was going to be him, my heart sunk, because he always wants me to whimper and cry and beg, and come up with extreme torture to beg him for. Even though I am not actually getting my titties nailed to the wall—and that's not the most extreme that he gets—and I haven't come during one of his calls since that first time I got caught up in it and lost it, I still emerge on the other end of those 90-minute calls fucking wrung out and panting and sweaty, with a sore throat and aching head. At the end of it, all I could say was, well, everything else after this will be a snap.

My regular callers are certainly happy. My Saturday night lactation date was my second caller back, and when I said, "Wow, you got lucky! Tonight was my first night back on", he said, "I know, I marked it on my calender!"

So, yeah...

I don't quite know what to do with that kind of dedication, just like I don't know what to do with the almost-emotional welcome that my Tuesday-night trucker gave me. He was getting downright tender, letting me know how much he missed me (I believe it) and how he didn't even call the service that whole month (I don't believe it, but still, it's sweet of him to think to say it).

My trucker and I have been speaking for a half-hour once a week since... June 2009? Almost 10 months. Really? I mean... that's a committed phone bone right there. We're starting to reach the point—I can feel it in the way he half-says some things—where we're both wondering where this relationship is going. He wishes he could meet me, of course, which is different from my idea of the next level.

That would be the 45-minute level. Don't want to rush him into anything.

PHONE WHORE (world premiere)

Location: Fetish Fair Fleamarket, Providence, RI
Link out: Click here
Description: Is the world ready for Phone Whore? Let's find out, when Cameryn Moore's gritty slice-of-life drama about phone sex, fantasy, and life "on the lines" premieres on opening night of the Fetish Fair Fleamarket in Providence, RI. If you're already planning to be at the Flea, make this one-hour theatrical experience your first stop! You must have paid admission to the FFF to attend this event. Blackstone Room.

SPECIAL TALKBACK SESSION: come join Cameryn and Phone Whore director Lisa Dupre at 9:30 pm for discussion and feedback about this exciting new play!
Start Time: 18:45
Date: 2010-02-12
End Time: 19:45

Book Review: The Big Book of Sex Toys

Confession: I don't need sex toys to do my job. I have one little vibe that I keep on my chair-side table, in case someone wants to hear me "use" a vibrator. A dildo? Sounds like a blow job (fingers in the mouth) with extra slobber because I Am So Wet, Oh God. Butt plugs? Please. I just moan extra loud.

But my callers do use sex toys--when I tell them to, when they're turned on, when they just can't help themselves and want to get something nice and hard in their ass--so I feel that a phone whore is actually a good person to check out Tristan Taormino's newest book, the Big Book of Sex Toys .

First of all, the Big Book on Sex Toys isn't TOO big. I mean, at about 8 inches, it's bigger than average, but it's not going to kill you to use it, know what I mean? And although the title has a certain kiddie-book feel to it, none of the pictures are pop-up. (This always makes me sad about adult sex-ed books.) However, what the book lacks in physical dimensions is more than redeemed by the amount of useful and sexy information caught between these hard covers.

Taormino, whose sex-ed empire is vast and wonderful, really lays all of her experience on the table with this project. You can see it in the coverage--everything from basic vibes to jewel-studded buttplugs to floggers and some really logical sex furniture--and the wonderful sidebars (the problem with phthalates, can I get addicted to my vibrator).  One of the best features of the book is the Perfect Pairing, in which Taormino pulls out one of the recommended products and puts it with a position that best utilizes the features of that product. You get detailed tips for the physical logistics, precise directions for positioning the product, and a FUCKING HOT PHOTO TO GO WITH IT.

The writing is upbeat, educational but not dry (never dry, dry is bad!), and while BBST is obviously meant to be a shopper's guide to the goodies, with loads of pictures of some of the newest toys on the market, it's not a mindless catalog: Taormino and associates clearly gave these items a good whirl or two. The resource guide at the back helps readers find the well-lit, non-sticky-floor stores and the more reputable online sources.

I could ask for slightly more thorough referencing of the photos of sex toys, but I'm willing to overlook it because DID I MENTION THE HOT PHOTOS?! On a related note, I would like to have seen some same-sex action. Both in language and visual representation, BBST is patently meant for straight couples, which is, like, YAY for hot straight sex, and for a chapter about strap-ons that shows willing boy butt. And yet, my first encounter with the thigh harness was with another girl, and that was 15 years ago. I mean, let's give some props where they're due!

Overall, though, BBST is an excellent addition to the sexually curious bookshelf, with enough "for more reading" to give precocious kinksters a kick. I wish all of my callers would get their own copies. Then maybe the ones who bitch about how their wives aren't giving them any would get some action again, and the ones who use carrots would STOP USING CARROTS.

Friday f*ckbucket: the psychic version

After a few months out and about talking about phone sex at open mics, and a lot of time out on facebook, I think I'm developing some psychic abilities. I don't like to mention it—I mean, some people already fidget a little when I tell them I'm a PSO, a psychic one might be a little Too Much—but for days like today, with a post due, it comes in handy. Because instead of waiting for the actual virtual f*ckbucket to fill up (I think I'm switching over to another platform for next week's bucket, to make it easier to participate in), I can just reach my mind out to the PSYCHIC f*ckbucket and pick out the questions that I know people have been wondering. Don't worry, I'm not good enough yet to know who was thinking which question, so you will retain your anonymity. (Except you, Scotty.)

I wonder if she recognizes my voice?
Never fear! I have spoken with close to 500 different men over the past nine months on the lines, and that is just too many for my aural memory to keep up. Besides, your appearance distracts me from listening well, because in my mind's eye you're all 6'2", 190 pounds, and incredibly well hung. Men's actual physical variety is a little disorienting after that.

What's so special about her? I talk dirty with my boyfriend all the time!
What's special about me is I don't give it away like you do. I went out and found somebody who will pay me a decent percentage for doing it.

What's your office like?
My office has good padding on the two walls near the desk, insulated with actual pillows and leftover professional-grade sound-attenuating foam, plus a good thick rug on the floor. However, a couple of months ago I got roommates who didn't give a shit what kind of noise I was making up in my attic chambers, so I started to take calls from the easy chair in my room. I've got one of those old-style telephone end tables to hold my index card box, my dayplanner, and whatever non-phone-sex project I'm working on, and my laptop with the timer on it sits on the nearby dresser. I want to get a good ergonomic office chair and get back over to my office, though. Taking calls less than 8 feet away from the spot where I actually fuck might constitute blurry boundaries.

What's the nastiest word or phrase you've ever said in a phone call?
Leaky-assed, cum-guzzling man whore. Or the n-word. It's a toss-up.

Have you done all the things you talk about on the phone or in your stand-up?
Most. I mean, not move for move, but the general gist of things, yeah. As I say in my standard self-description on the phones, "I have been around the block a little bit." I might add, however, that first-hand experience is not a requirement to do phone sex. A well-read individual, or perhaps one who spends a lot of time on youporn, would be able to get started, if he or she also did some supplementary reading on the boards or forums for whatever kinks or fetishes they were lacking knowledge in.

Which calls do you really enjoy taking?
The ones where I get to be sarcastic. It's not so much a strain to stay in character.


Stay tuned early next week for the next f*ckbucket, with a new survey platform, and PRIZES, too!

Cameryn gets down and dirty in the Burren’s comedy contest!

Title: Cameryn gets down and dirty in the Burren's comedy contest!
Location: 247 Elm St. (Davis Sq), Somerville
Description: Every Wednesday night, seven comedians do 7-minute sets, and the $50 prize goes to the person who gets the most applause at the end. I'm not above stacking the house, so if you're a Cameryn Moore fan in the Boston area, get your ass out there!
Start Time: 22:00
Date: 2010-01-13

Friday f*ckbucket: the sexy-time stretch goal

Last week's f*ckbucket question: what sexual act or kink play have you never tried, but really want to? Why haven't you done it yet?

I love the answers that came out of the bucket! These are fantastic things to aim for...

  • Being gagged with a ball gag. Sex toys are expensive! Le sigh.

I think you mean quality sex toys are expensive, and yes, that's very true. Especially anything you strap around your body, you want it to be comfortable, right? Good-quality ball gags are worth saving up for. I already have a wonderful one, and now I'm saving up for the kind with interchangeable pieces for the mouth, so I can switch out between balls of different sizes (yes, motherfucker, that's what she said) and mouth plugs or small dildos, and also those mad-dentist-looking mouth gags. Because a girl should have options!

  • fisting - haven't tried because a comfortable atmosphere for it hasn't been created, but ooooh it definitely will in the future!

Lessee... comfortable atmosphere for fisting.... Drop cloth, check. Six-pack of Bounty two-ply towels, check. Ten-gallon bucket o' lube, check. Well-trimmed fingernails and/or gloves, check. Easily adjusted central heating, check. A thorough enema, if you're going for anal, check. AAANNNDDD, a fister you can count on to listen to you... that is harder to find. Good luck, set your safewords, and go for it!

  • Have a three way with two men ( I am f) I havent found the ppl I can trust and feel comfortable with?

Hmmmyup. Three-ways always need that comfort level, and then you've gotta trust them not to blather it all over the world that you're a cock-hungry nympho, or something like that (my junior year in college was... awkward, for exactly this reason). It also strikes me that for a M-F-M threeway, you're gonna want guys who are hot for your bod, and at the same time who feel comfortable being that close to another man's dick. Bi, in other words, or else very, very comfortable in their own sense of masculinity.

  • tribadism

Definitely worth a try, but they didn't leave a reason why they haven't done it yet, so I can't help any further.

  • pegging

Here's where all the issues converge: the trust and the expensive equipment and the confidentiality and patience and issues of masculinity, all bundled up in one delicious act. (For those who don't know, pegging is when a woman penetrates a man with a strap-on?) My advice here? Women, be patient. Men, restrain your ambition.


This week, rather than you answering a question of mine, I want to return to the origins of f*ckbucketry and have you pose questions to me. Any question about sex, phone sex, fantasies, kink, etc... If I don't know the answer or at least have an opinion--not likely to happen, but it could!--I will at least talk to an expert in that particular field, or put in some useful URLs for you to get into trouble about at work. To submit your question, just click on this link to go to the anonymous survey. A selection of questions, plus my responses, will be posted next Friday, along with the next f*ckbucket.

stand-up comedy, kink, and you

Finally got some footage from one of these comedy open mikes, so those of you not able to catch my comedy shtick live can at least get a taste of it.

I call it shtick, but that doesn't do justice to how seriously I take these sets. Every time I do stand-up in a new room, I'm constantly debating myself about which anecdotes and observations to use, what threads of my own thoughts to follow, what level of gutter talk to use, because in most cases I have no idea about what pre-existing level of sex positivity and kink acceptance the audience has, and that affects their response to my material more than almost anything, I think.

I feel a lot of responsibility for how I present my work, and it's not just because I respect my callers, or at least I respect their urge toward sexual release. It's also because I want the audience to get closer to that sort of respect, too, if they aren't already there. I'm not going to be malicious or scornful about my callers and their desires, because if anyone in the audience shares those desires, I don't want them to close down even further about them in their own lives.

Sometimes I look at my material and wonder people think that I'm going for shock value. I mean, I am, a little, or I wouldn't insist that the hosts introduce me with my full title. But I also want to try to move beyond that in my stand-up, get to the juicy stuff, the taboo and fantasy stuff, the psychology, and I just feel like I'm going to be stuck wrestling with sex ed 101 and puritan value systems the whole time.

Sometimes I wonder if, because it's my work, because it's real, the sex talk is somehow less acceptable than the stuff the real comics spew out, which everyone understands is fake. Of course I'm going to be as explicit as I need to be about the work that I do, because for fuck's sake, it's my work. And I do want to put it out there the way it's put to me. On the other hand, audiences vary widely in their understanding and acceptance of sex, fantasy, and kink. How much does my language about those issues ffect how they hear me?


I don't know if it's possible, but I want to find that bridge that's going to enable us to meet somewhere in the middle, where I feel like at least some tiny fragment of my work is getting across and they feel like they can safely laugh. This set is actually my first attempt to approach that bridge in a meta way, my first real-time explication of Cameryn's General Theory of Kink Relativity...

e[lust] #4: dig in with both hands, people

Last week I submitted my cuckold post to a new smut/sex carnival list, e[lust], and here's #4. Lots of amazing blogs to read in between taking calls, writing new jokes, and updating my facebook status, so I'm psyched, and I'm extra glad to be able to share these sexy-time blogs with you, too... Stay tuned tomorrow for a new feature, F*ckbucket!


Welcome to e[lust] - your source for sexual intelligence and inspirations of lust from the smartest & sexiest bloggers! Whether you’re looking for hot steamy smut, thought-provoking opinions or expert information, you’re going to find it here. Want to be included in the next edition? Start with the rules, check out the schedule in the site’s sidebar and subscribe to the RSS feed for updates!

♦ This Week’s Top Three Posts ♦

Interrogation - I looked up at him, feigning cluelessness. “I know you can understand me. So I ask you again. Where are the lenses?” Another strike. I crumpled into the bench.

Reconciling the Identities of Feminist & Butch Top - There’s something supposedly anti-feminist about wanting to dominate. There’s something in the feminist rhetoric which says we are all equal especially in bed, so that means I-do-you-you-do-me….

Fire and IceThe rain comes down harder around us, the freez­ing drop pelt­ing what­ever skin lies exposed over the sur­face of the water.

e[lust] Editress

By the Twinkling Lights… - His lips found my nipples and I forgot about the cold. If a car were to drive by and the passengers were to look past the twinkling lights on the tree, they would have seen a naked woman’s rear end pressed against the glass wall..

♦ Featured Post (Lilly’s Pick)

Ronjazz: Late Night Rendezvous - Meet me in the parking lot at the post with the broken lamp. 10PM sharp! Do not be late! Stand facing the post, eyes closed. Wear a flimsy dress and heels – nothing else!

See also: Pleasurists #58 and #59 for all your sex toy review needs

Erotic Writing

Diary Of A Pissed Off Wife
Happy Halloween
Heartbreak hotel
Marathon Sex
Not Always, But Often: Part 1
Our (Sorta) Intro to BDSM
Rising above the Background
Sex at 2am
The Babysitter
The Chair
The Beginning?
The Pleasure Chest
The Slut Chronicles #10 ~ The Interview
The Walk
Today’s Specials: Orgasms, Wet Panties, and Margaritas
Twinkling Heat
We are glass
What I Want

Kink & Fetish

Amber’s New Dungeon

Awesome Body Mod Night
Day of Debauchery
Go Ask Teresa: Mothers
Jack was a Picky Eater
Kissing Noises
My very first experience of BDSM
Play Piercing? Seriously? Why?!?
Sounds and Catheters
The Taking of M

Thoughts & Advice on Sex & Relationships

Aftercare, Part I: The Basics

Ask The Negress: Privacy & Perversion.
Do Slaves Deserve Love?

Gyne-Vestiphobia: Fear of Women’s Clothing
Let There Be Love
On My Experience With Sex Toys
Riding The Crimson Wave – Having Sex On Your Period
The Gangbang as Social Commentary
Titty Fucking

TPE (Total Power Exchange): A Novice’s Perspective
Weekend Fun

Sex News, Interviews, Politics & Humor

December 17th
God rest ye, merry cuckold!
You’ve Got To Be Nuts

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